Sakhi's Laghukatha

Fire!

Posted on: June 15, 2009

There was fire in his eyes…

Fire of love, fire of jealousy, fire of betrayal…

Betrayal?

Why?

She was his friend, nothing else, or so he said, time and again!

“Congratulations!” he said, with fire in his eyes and bouquet in his hands!

P.S. Tried 55er for the first time. Haven’t used all 55 words though. Hope I haven’t disappointed you guys🙂

56 Responses to "Fire!"

Hmm.. nice try..!🙂
Not as good as all ur stories, but a nice 55er !!😉

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hmmm… have to think about this!🙂

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There was fire in his eyes…

Fire of love, fire of jealousy, fire of betrayal…

Betrayal?

Why?

She was his friend, nothing else, or so he said, time and again!

“Congratulations!” he said and she Punched him and broke his specs.

P.S: In case of fire, break the glass.

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ROFL! 😀 😀 I wish I was as witty as you are🙂

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Please write more long stories. They are wonderful!

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hee..hee… thanks!🙂 I get the message!🙂

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😦
No …there is no need for fire.
Love is always about wishing the other all happiness…so no need for fire.

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I hold it true, whate’er befall;
I feel it, when I sorrow most;
‘Tis better to have loved and lost
Than never to have loved at all.

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Wow, that ws something!!🙂

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not used all 55 but still say a lot.. good try…🙂

LOL @ Anshul😀

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Thanks!🙂

And about anshul, he steals my show, always, with his witty comments!🙂

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Just 55 words?

Wow!

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Gee… thanks🙂

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Not like your full longer ones….but I cant blame you. 55 is just too small a quantity for this.

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🙂 I know but i wanted to try and think i have failed miserably!🙂

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Aapki lambi wali Laghukathaye jyada prabhvit karti hain.Kripya hame hamri lambi Laghukathaon se alag na karen..

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Shukriya… yeh mein apne zehen mein rakhungi!🙂

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Nice one!! and LOL at Anshul’s punch😀

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Heyyy, thats me !!! I mean, thats how I used to feel when I go for any wedding😉

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😆 😆 hope you never got punched😉

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this will make up a nice prologue for a high suspense detective novel … lol

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What an idea sirji!🙂

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Nice🙂 Ha almost imagined myself in the guys position and then Anshul’s comment kinda made my eyes hurt😉

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Not bad! Not bad!🙂
Although I must say that Anshul’s version was much better.😛

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I too felt ki anshul’s version was much better!🙂

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It was quite nice actually, read more like a poem. I wasn’t sure I understood the last line though.

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It was to mention that when the protagonist had a choice he was dilly-dalying and when the girl married someone else, he had all the wrong emotions😉

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Nice attempt, only somewhere its hurt and no end to it.

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Kahin aapne chot to nahi khayi hai kabhi!

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Haale dil sunane se darte hai sabhi,

Apne dil ki agg se dusro ko jalane se darte hai sabhi,

Sabh khud he khaakh ho jayege agar,

agar har ek kahani ka anth hoga yehi…

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Wah, wah.. wah, wah!!🙂

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Well i have written something, of my own please take and look and give your comment.
http://blog.sushantchaudhary.com/2009/06/18/you-are-my-imagination/

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Nice one… sakhi..🙂 good try

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Aag hi aag!

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Shaaattttuuuppp😛 😛

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Liked it🙂
and understood even more from the explanation you gave after which it now makes perfect sense..was wondering about the betrayal part🙂

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Khud hi soch liya protagonist ne ki uski dost sirf uski hi hai…😉

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Jab koi upna tha hi nahi, how can that become betrayal? There is a quote that I am reminded of, in this situation – ‘If you love someone deeply, let go. If they come back, they were always yours. If they don’t, they were never yours!”

Destination Infinity

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In this case the protagonist thought on his own that the “friend” was “his” without having to bother about expressing his feelings or getting to know the girl’s!!🙂

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Well done with just a few words! But this isn’t exactly a Sakhi ending🙂

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hee..hee… hee…

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nice attempt…

found this really interesting…trying to pen in a short story in 55 words…will try put a few myself…

your long stories are really nice and intereting too :):)
seem to touch different emotions in each one…

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Thanks and i too feel more comfortable writing the long ones… 55 words, i feel, is too less for me!🙂

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Wow !!! a very nice 55-er …. I have been reading 55-ers in blogs around off late and this one’s really good …
and I must say one needs some mastery over fiction writing to write a 55-er well like you did in your first attempt…
the ‘punch’ version was also funny😀

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M I spoing it… by posting the 56th comment? or is it gonna be deleted?

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Creative Commons Licence
Sakhi's Laghukatha by Sakhi (aka Dr. Dhara Shah) is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-NonCommercial-NoDerivs 3.0 Unported License.
Permissions beyond the scope of this license may be available at sakhi.laghukatha@gmail.com.

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